So, yesterday we had a guy in the ED who was dragging around his one-wheeled cart full of dismembered, scalped, and decapitated sex doll body parts wrapped in saran wrap and littered with wet lacy underwear and long socks. Honorable mention would be for the swastikas drawn all over the well-worn boobies, which confused me. Ashley (another RN) had the pleasure of dragging it clear across campus, only to have to drag it back when she couldn't find a place to store it. The body parts kept rolling out of the cart, and I'm not sure if anybody gave her weird looks about why she was transporting such...goods.
The humor award still goes to the poor blighter who came in after scalding his entire torso while making doughnuts shirtless; he did lots of things right to stop the burning, but that probably doesn't include slathering his entire upper body with yellow mustard to stop the pain. He thought the vinegar in the mustard would help, and maybe the vinegar would have, but he didn't think about the picante aspect of mustard. Ruth told him he smelled like a giant hot dog.
Also, I've decided to braid my beard. It's going to be amazing.
The Sunset
11 months ago
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